As a child, I lived in Columbus, Ohio with my parents and two brothers, both older than me. Growing up in a middle-class family, I was raised in denominational churches but I did not know the Lord. My family and I went to churches that did not preach or teach the gospel or salvation. Something I learned later in life was that I was born a Jew, on both my paternal and maternal side.
In 1969, my mother passed away after a battle with cancer. She was a wonderful, loving person – tough, but loving, a woman to be admired for many reasons. When she died, I blamed myself and was full of guilt. I felt shame, was sad, terrified and very torn.
For a Science Fair Project, I had been carelessly doing experiments with large amounts of asbestos dust in the family home basement. In my preparation and studies, I knew, yet didn’t take seriously enough, the dangers of asbestos. In my fourteen-year-old ego, I was doing the experiment so that I could create a new invention to win the State Science Fair – which I accomplished. But it wasn’t worth hurting my mother (or me).
Because of the guilt and shame, I never told anyone about the rock-hard tumor that I noticed growing in my abdomen – which started just one month after my mother’s passing. I was only fifteen at the time.
What I didn’t know was there were deadly curses coming from both sides of the lineage against my mother and my family. My father’s mother, the Jewish witch, was well-known and sought after because her curses always came true. She had cursed my mother to die an early painful death – which she did. And second, from my mother’s father, the orthodox Rabbi, who sat rocking in a zombie-like trance, chanting curses on her until the day he died. There were many things working against my mother. Explaining why people hated her so much is complicated. To delve into it fully I would need to go back multiple generations to explain where the generational curses began, which I won’t go into here.
So while my experiments with asbestos in the basement didn’t help the situation, they weren’t the root cause of my mother’s death. I didn’t know that at that time. I only learned of the generational dysfunction and real causes many years later.
Dealing with the tumor growing in my abdomen, I had no hope. I didn’t know where I was going when I died. The words, “going to heaven” did not connect. I felt alone.
During this time, I would come home from high school and sit in my family room alone. My father was gone working long hours and my two older brothers were away in college and the military, respectively. For many months, I’d close my eyes and see the same vision in my mind – over and over, day after day. I’d look from one end of the horizon to the other and see a single series of cloud puffs just slowly moving along. On top of each cloud was a scene in time.
I would stare at the farthest cloud formation I could see, starting on the left where they began. I would watch it slowly move along until it got overhead and then I’d look at the scene on top. What I saw was a depiction in time of people and things living on – without me. I’d watch that cloud puff until it reached the far end of the horizon, on the right, then I’d look back to the farthest cloud I could see on the left and observe another future disheartening scene overhead without me in it – over and over again.
This happened every day with no end. These images left me with a helpless feeling. Time was not going to stop when I died. That scared me – because I didn’t know where I was going for eternity.
Then one day, while I was sitting there, watching the endless eternal progression of clouds, fearing the future, something very strange happened. I heard the audible voice of the Lord. Yes, I mean audible. His voice came across as loud as roaring thunder.
He said, “I love you,” and, “Someday I’ll provide your perfect mate for you.”
The words surrounded me with so much love – an overwhelming love I had never felt before, like rivers of living water, full of love, flowing over me.
I finally knew that God was real and near, not just some faraway God who created the universe. He was a close Father who actually loved me. But the second part about a “perfect mate” confused me. I knew I was dying so how could that promise be fulfilled? I ignored the second part but God’s love echoed through my whole being. All I could think about was how I could get there. How could I reach the Father in time, before I died?
A month later, my brother, Bruce, came home from college and told my father and me a crazy story. He proceeded to tell us that he had been on a bad LSD trip and called out on the Lord Jesus to save him. Bruce had heard the gospel previously. Jesus answered and took him down off that trip, instantly sobered and in his right mind. This was 1970 and no one did hard drugs or would joke about such a thing in an upper middle-class family. I’m sure both my and my father’s jaw had fallen to the ground in utter shock and disbelief.
After the shock wore off, I knew I had to ask Bruce how he had such an experience with God. I wanted that same experience before my death. Bruce explained that I needed to repent and ask the Lord into my heart. I tried – but I didn’t feel anything happen. This really discouraged me.
For the next 6-8 months I languished, knowing I was dying and without hope. I wasn’t even seeing the cloud puffs any longer. Unfortunately, because of my shame, disappointment and fear, I became caught up in all the wrongs things. I started drinking heavily, able to down a fifth of whiskey within two hours with my friends, and proud of it. Drinking and driving was dangerous and I’m sure I had a lot of angels who protected me during that time.
I bought an old ’49 Harley in boxes, fixed it up, built it into a chopper and started riding with motorcycle gangs. For reasons I won’t go into in this story, I hated my dad and wanted to get back at him. My inner struggle was so intense that I planned to take my motorcycle to the Grand Canyon and drive it over the edge to my death. If I was going to die, I would die on my own terms. Unfortunately, my bike was so unreliable that it would blow head gaskets all the time. I was tearing it down and rebuilding it each and every week. I could never get it running enough to leave town. I wonder who kept messing up my plans.
Then one day, towards the end of the 6-8 months of my rebellious stage, I was out carousing with my biker gang buddies. We were sitting on our parked bikes, drinking bottle after bottle of cheap wine. I don’t remember how it started but suddenly we veered into a spiritual discussion. I told them about what happened to my brother Bruce and that nothing had happened to me when I prayed. They seemed interested. They didn’t condemn or ridicule him or me.
At that very moment, a light came on. All of a sudden, in an instant, I realized that me admitting that nothing had happened was not true. There was an overwhelming sense of the greatest peace in my heart which could not be explained. Also, I was instantly sobered – just like it had happened to Bruce
I told my friends, “I have to leave.”
The next day, I decided to quit drinking and did so with no withdrawals – as well as the whole Grand Canyon plan was off. Immediately, I started telling everyone about the love of the Father. God led me from one Christian meeting to another until I found the church He wanted me to be a part of. There I thrived. I learned. I grew spiritually.
The church I attended was in the early stages of the Charismatic movement where we saw many miracles. I knew the power of God and that He could heal anyone. But I was okay that He didn’t heal me and I’d be going home to be with Him soon. I had dedicated my remaining life and time to Him. Being in a church which was moving in the tangible presence of God, I was hearing His still small voice a lot.
One night, I was riding on my motorcycle, heading home from a meeting.
God spoke to me and said, “Do you see in Isaiah where I said healing was going to happen (in the future) with Jesus?”
I answered, “Yes.”
“Do you see in First Peter where I said the healing happened (in the past)?”
“Yes.”
He said, “Isaiah was looking forward to the cross, and Peter was looking back to the cross. All was completed at the cross.”
I was listening intently.
Then He said, “Do you want to receive that healing?”
I innocently, nonchalantly said, “Sure.”
In that very instant I felt the change and I knew God had healed me. The rock-hard tumor that had grown for a year and a half in my abdomen, from the size of a walnut to larger than a football, just dissipated, melted, completely vanished within 24 hours – at which time my abdomen returned to normal.
God was so gracious to me. He saved me, healed me and delivered me from so many things. He is a supernatural God who is always with us, listening and speaking in His still small voice. I am so grateful for His healing power in my life – but I’m even more grateful to be able to live a daily Spirit-led life with Him. And, years later, God did provide a perfect wife, Danielle, for me. I am grateful that He knows all things and that all things are subject to Him.
Submitted by: Tom Snow
This story was taken from Tom Snow’s new book – The Daily Stand : A Spiritual Warfare Instruction Manual for Today and the Upcoming Next Great Move of God. This book is an accumulation of fifty plus years of personal experience and scripture, exploring topics that Christian believers need to know in walking with the Lord in daily life in a very practical, non-religious way. This manual shows how to stand against evil and effectively use God’s authority in Christ to stop it.
Once we get to Heaven and God shows us a reel of our life, we will discover how many times we were rescued, protected or redirected by supernatural means. What a divine privilege it is that, during our time on earth, God gives us snapshots into the supernatural realm, unusual happenings that announce that Heaven is present and involved in our lives.
For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.
Psalm 91:11
If you would like to share a personal story of supernatural protection or angelic activity in your history, please reach out. Private message me on Facebook messenger or email me and I will explain the details. I would love to share your testimony on my blog as an encouragement to others. As it says in Hebrews 3:13, Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today’.
